Accidental breakage

If a friend breaks something in your house by a bit of carelessness albeit an accident should they pay or should I ask them to pay the insurance excess of $250.

If they hit your car with theirs while parking in your drive, you'd expect them to make the claim on their insurance and to pay the excess, wouldn't you?
In your situation, they can't claim against their insurance, so claiming against yours and asking them to only pay the excess seems very reasonable, unless you know they will struggle to pay, and you won't.

A bit more detail. please, if you really want a measured response.
On the surface however, I think I would value the friendship of a 'friend' (seeing that I am too discerning to have too many) far in excess of $250.
The paradox here is that if he/she isn't a 'friend' (in the strictest sense) you'll be lucky to get paid, and if they are a 'true friend' they wouldn't need to be asked - they'd offer. So, if you were a true friend you wouldn't ask.

It depends on the circumstances and what it is.
A friends daughter broke and electric violin of mine. I did not ask for payment.
The child was showing an interest in learning to play an instrument, so I handed it to her to have a try. She dropped it and it split in half. Fortunately I had picked the instrument I was least attached to (and I thought hardest to break), though with hindsight giving a child anything other than a penny whistle could result in damage. But at least it was not one of the other violins worth $4.5k

However had it been a friend who got drunk, wandered into the room with my collection of priceless ming vases without asking and broke a few I would be expecting them to cough up at least something.

kai wrote:
However had it been a friend who got drunk, wandered into the room with my collection of priceless ming vases without asking and broke a few I would be expecting them to cough up at least something.

If you could afford a collection of priceless Ming vases, you might just be able to afford the insurance. :whistle:

The first time I loaned money was $20 in 1975, which was about the equivalent of your loan now. My friend paid me back in full and became my very good friend for all his far too short life. I am hugely grateful for that amount that I gave to Rob Eyles which he paid me back. Some of the loans since have been much less beneficial to me, so I am glad that they are no longer my friends.
So I would either write it and him off, or ask politely and wait for the response.

LongRidge wrote: The first time I loaned money was $20 in 1975, which was about the equivalent of your loan now. My friend paid me back in full and became my very good friend for all his far too short life. I am hugely grateful for that amount that I gave to Rob Eyles which he paid me back. Some of the loans since have been much less beneficial to me, so I am glad that they are no longer my friends.
So I would either write it and him off, or ask politely and wait for the response.

$20 in 1975 is nowhere near equivalent to $250 today. Approximately $90 today, would be more correct.
Apart from that, a loan is a loan - which implies a prior agreement between two parties.(In the absence of which, it's a gift).
As I understand the question, we are dealing here with an 'accident'; which is no more like a loan or a gift than a Ming vase is like a Stradivarius.

Insurance is all very well as far as it goes. Insurance can replace a near new item with another new item but in the examples given of a Stradivarius violin or Ming dynasty porcelain it can pay out a sum approximating the value of the item but the replacement item may well be unobtainable.

WillEyre wrote: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

The paradox here is that if he/she isn't a 'friend' (in the strictest sense) you'll be lucky to get paid, and if they are a 'true friend' they wouldn't need to be asked - they'd offer. So, if you were a true friend you wouldn't ask.

This is so true.

If I broke something in some-one else's house I would be embarrassed and horrified and offer to pay ( while hoping its not Ming :ohmy: ) If a friend broke something in my house, I would still expect an offer to pay, even if I declined it. Are they unaware of the value or are they unable to replace the item? Did you say "don't worry about it" and they have taken you at your word?

If the friendship is valuable to you - don't ask.

Tricky, if I lend someone something is a power tool and it was broken, I would expect they fixed it ....but this was an accident, and obviously something of significant value.
You said it was by carelessness so I get the feeling there is more behind this.
How much do you value the friendship......more or less than $250.00.

I'm still eagerly waiting for Rod's reappearance to tell us just what it was that his friend 'accidentally' broke.
In the interim, let me guess; did he throw a bottle at the big-screen when that 'Cigna Funeral Cover' fisher-guy strutted down the jetty for the 99th time?

WillEyre wrote: I'm still eagerly waiting for Rod's reappearance to tell us just what it was that his friend 'accidentally' broke.
In the interim, let me guess; did he throw a bottle at the big-screen when that 'Cigna Funeral Cover' fisher-guy strutted down the jetty for the 99th time?

Nah! Old fishermen never die, they only drop a sinker.

Stikkibeek wrote:

WillEyre wrote: I'm still eagerly waiting for Rod's reappearance to tell us just what it was that his friend 'accidentally' broke.
In the interim, let me guess; did he throw a bottle at the big-screen when that 'Cigna Funeral Cover' fisher-guy strutted down the jetty for the 99th time?

Nah! Old fishermen never die, they only drop a sinker.

Well, that particular Old Fisherman looks so smug that I'd pick that he's more likely to drop a floater!

WillEyre wrote: I'm still eagerly waiting for Rod's reappearance to tell us just what it was that his friend 'accidentally' broke.
In the interim, let me guess; did he throw a bottle at the big-screen when that 'Cigna Funeral Cover' fisher-guy strutted down the jetty for the 99th time?

Followed by a second bottle at that little madam telling us all to Get Lost........... :sick:

Sorry WillEyre I have been a bit reticent but I didn't really want to give more info and identify the older relation who not drunk but was fooling a bit and walked quickly through a closed sliding door breaking the glass (thinking it was open). Total cost was about $460.