Any recent updates on Hestia?

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10 years 6 months ago #30029 by max2
As its christmas eve, I was just giving Hestia a thought. Has anyone heard from her recently, I gather from past threads that things didn't go all the best when she got back home....

I do hope though that Christmas Eve finds her well, warm and in very good company. :) :) :)

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10 years 6 months ago #406024 by Mich
Replied by Mich on topic Any recent updates on Hestia?
Hi Swaggie - I emailed her about a week ago to check how she was doing. I was really hopeful that things were at last working out for her as in an earlier email she said she had obtained a permanent position, had bred some beautiful puppies and, although working all hours of the day, seemed a bit more positive.

I got a quick note back (with a longer one to come) to say that the permanent job had fallen through, so she was pretty much back to square one on that front. She had hoped to sell the puppies but due to delays with kennel club registration, had only been able to sell one. I'm concerned about her as I know things are tight and she was anxious about heading into winter with so much still to do to get the house fixed up.

I truly don't know how she's able to stay so strong and focused, given what a tremendously difficult road she's had to walk over the past couple of years. One can only admire her attitude and pray that things get easier for her very soon. I'm sure she'll be encouraged to know that her LSB friends are asking after her, and I'll suggest she pops in to say hello when I hear from her next time.
Cheers, Mich.

Good exercise for the heart is to bend down and help someone up. Anon.

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10 years 6 months ago #406037 by max2
Replied by max2 on topic Any recent updates on Hestia?
Thanks for the update Mich, yes please do let her know I was giving her a thought and that I do hope that things turn for the better for her ASAP.

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10 years 6 months ago #406126 by Toast
Replied by Toast on topic Any recent updates on Hestia?
Me too.

[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]Toast is the best food in the world
Whisky is the best drink in the world

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10 years 6 months ago #406143 by DiDi
Replied by DiDi on topic Any recent updates on Hestia?
I wonder guys, having been on here for so many years, about the people who have quietly disappeared. Those that were in need of help but did not ask for it.

I worked with Hestia (via the internet) a long time ago and sourced people in Govt and in WINZ in an attempt to help when her hubby was dying but could never get the outcome that I was asking her to follow up. I'm not saying on the face of it that she would win but with direct contact, usually it was a major in opening doors. I became frustrated ultimately and stopped "helping".

I never could understand whether there was a major language breakdown but also was aware of where Hestia was working and without a good command of the English language, I was left wondering why this was not getting through.

I too hope that she has found happiness and is settled at home but have to admit that I ultimately decided that she was choosing to be a victim and gleaning subsequent support. Harsh I know but I decided to walk away. I am GLAD there are people with bigger hearts than me on this site.

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10 years 6 months ago #406179 by max2
Replied by max2 on topic Any recent updates on Hestia?

DiDi;401991 wrote: I wonder guys, having been on here for so many years, about the people who have quietly disappeared. Those that were in need of help but did not ask for it.

I worked with Hestia (via the internet) a long time ago and sourced people in Govt and in WINZ in an attempt to help when her hubby was dying but could never get the outcome that I was asking her to follow up. I'm not saying on the face of it that she would win but with direct contact, usually it was a major in opening doors. I became frustrated ultimately and stopped "helping".

I never could understand whether there was a major language breakdown but also was aware of where Hestia was working and without a good command of the English language, I was left wondering why this was not getting through.

I too hope that she has found happiness and is settled at home but have to admit that I ultimately decided that she was choosing to be a victim and gleaning subsequent support. Harsh I know but I decided to walk away. I am GLAD there are people with bigger hearts than me on this site.


I think I know which posts you are referring to Didi and understand where you are coming from. I think at times we all felt the same.....

I do think though that some people know how to ''work'' the system better than others, and of those, some do just give up out of frustration or not knowing how to step something forward.

Recently I had cause to telephone the police twice over an event and the 2nd time the operator advised me ''there was little the police could do'' but subsequent talks with the MIL of a policeman said bull...t, they could have done A,B, and C to put a stop to that... and she was well aware of the people involved and their prior convictions. So had I known that during my 2nd call, I could well have insisted those things occur and I am pretty sure the police didn't attend.

I suspect that maybe Hestia received too many brush offs in her time in NZ and so she accepted ''that was the way it was going to be'' regardless of whatever anyone else said.... :)

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10 years 6 months ago #406187 by Cinsara

swaggie;402028 wrote: I suspect that maybe Hestia received too many brush offs in her time in NZ and so she accepted ''that was the way it was going to be'' regardless of whatever anyone else said.... :)

I agree and I also suspect H had so little emotional strength to spare, it would all have been too hard to fight that fight on top of everything else. I just hope she is coping somehow :(

>

Save the Earth... it's the only planet with chocolate!

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10 years 6 months ago #406198 by Mich
Replied by Mich on topic Any recent updates on Hestia?
I got to know Hestia pretty late in the piece through the memory quilt that RaeM and I made for her. Until her husband became so ill, she had him to help support her and ease her through language and other barriers. She was, I think, a pretty happy person in those days.

Being in a foreign country and losing her husband so tragically along with the love and support he gave, then having to manage the farm, sell up then move her life back to Sweden must have been tremendously hard. It is to her very great credit that she did it and, despite difficulties she's faced rebuilding her life in Sweden, she's still staying positive.

Anyway, DiDi, I'm sure that Hestia very much appreciated the support she got from you, even though it may not have had the outcome you hoped for. Sometimes that happens, but it doesn't take away the fact that you tried. It was lovely of you and others on this site to do what you could and, in the end, those are the good things she can remember from her time here.

I'll keep you posted as I hear from her. If anyone would like to contact her directly, PM me and I'll put you in touch. Cheers, Mich.

Good exercise for the heart is to bend down and help someone up. Anon.

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10 years 6 months ago #406265 by Stikkibeek
It can be exceptionally isolating in a country that is essentially "foreign" I had a cousin in a similar situation who lived in Switzerland. Although she was reasonably competent in French, her in laws were German speaking Swiss which she found difficult. When her marriage ended, she was left to the mercy of the in laws and she longed to come back to NZ., even though she had no friends left here, but did have relatives. Rebuilding her life here was very difficult but she finally managed.
I imagine that for Hestia, the move back home represented safety and familiarity. I hope that things will work out for her even if the rebuilding phase is difficult..

Did you know, that what you thought I said, was not what I meant :S

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8 years 5 months ago #479134 by Hestia
Hi guys :)

Here I am , long time no see...

First a short thing about what happened..naah,,it can't just be short :)

My hubbie had a sick insurence,,that company did increase the cost and didnt inform him,,he had a short fuse and did cancel,,I asked him to not to stop his insurence,,he then said: no probs- when I go I just go. will crash the car or get a heart attach and just die....(he did drive as if it was a nascar race every day)......... and just a couple of months later he was sick.
It was a hard time even when he was still kind of healthy..
(not even him being a kiwi and with a good language could get what he asked for)
Local doctor didnt get how serious it was not to have eaten for weeks and suddenly not even be able to drink water.
We had to argue to get things going!
He was sent to a doctor that wanted to look thru his nose and throat only and he did so not get when we told that it was blockage further down.
Had to argue to be sent to a doctor that was into intestines. No such doctor had appointments free since start of january and holidays. I then did convince the ear and nose doc to send my hubbie to x-ray his throat.
They saw blockage directly and told him straight off at the x-ray that he was full of cancer in a firm grip around his oeasophagus.
Now he was sent to open up and do a key hole surgery and then sent straight off to get chemo.
The chemo doctor did prescribe him pills even though he could not even drink since totally blocked passage!
I had to argue this again,,doc said: ooops didnt realize!
Then it was chemo thru his veins at the hospital for a week and then he could start drinking youghurt and eat mushed spuds.
He had to be a day care patient every time they topped up his chemo thru his veins.
He got sacked after 10 days of sickness. (a company that did have commercials on radio for that they sponsor,,,,kids with cancer)
First three months of his sickness was: me getting up and looking after all animals,,then drive him 50 km to hospital,,turn around car and drive 90 km to my work and do a full day without breaks,,then drive 90 km to pick him up and 50 km home and look after the animals.
He got medication to take every 3-4 hrs and he did not respond to ampetamin or morphine and I did ask for him to be sent to pain clinic,,was told there was no such! It was so hard to loose his pay and then all the costs on my little pay.
3 months with chemo. 110 kilos were down to 60 kilos and he still had humour!
When he took a bath he said: dont take the plug out of the tub,,I might go down the drain. :)
After three months of chemo he did undergo the largest surgery that can be performed,,surgeon said: forget about brain or heart surgery,,that is nothing compared to what we are to do on your hubbie!
They opened up his bellie and took 2/3 of his stomach and then opened him up under his arm pit and towrads his back and took away 2/3 of his throat. Then they stitched what was left of his stomach around his throat at height of where his collar bone was. Food straight in to his intestines. They sent him home after a week and the surgeon said he was proud of sending home his patients early. When leavinghopsital a nurse gave me a prescription made by another doctor. They did not like their surgeon to send home patients so early without any pain killers at all! But he always did.
Surgeon said: now it is wifes work to be done!
I asked to see a dietician and surgeon said they know no more than neighbours wife and we did not get any referal.
This was in may-june..cold weatherboard cottage and I was flat brooke after expensive medications and loss of his income and expensive trips to hospital.
I had contacted hubbies grown up kids and his sibblings and I informed them all the way.
Their reply was: we don't want to see him sick and did not visit him!!
They also said: contact cancer foundation and ask for help.
OK we were given heaps of phamplets about to take all help given.
I did contact cancer foundation and they said: there is no help to get,,they only meant that we should both eat healthy and accept all help given from family and friends.
I contacted the local politician that thought we were to get help from ACC. Politician did not understand that ACC and all help was only for ACCIDENTS and that my incom was counted as his income with no look into all the expensives his sickness did cost.
The local politician and medical people and winz did just confirm that there is no help when a thing like this happens.
The human resource at my work did follow me to winz.
We were told taht if I did resign from my work, then they would look into what help we might get. They would not tell in advance. Also I was not just to be able to take a vacation from work and go back when he was dead,, I had to resign from work!!
The pay they would give would not pay trips to hospital or medicationand just and only not even the interests on the mortgage!
Winz said they had this pay a person to help out..bit it had to be a person that was not married to the sick person since partner had to do this work for free. We knew no one that would travel out to us and help out and get paid by winz since it had to be a totally unemplyed person with no income. How do you finds such person? old auntie stuck away in a granny flat?
So 3 months chemo and massive surgery, then 3 months chemo again.
During this time I had no fire wood and did search containers and pick wood on the roadside.
I was forced to go to work or we would be home less.
I did get in contact with a organisation which name I have forgotten. They did work with trying to make ACC to be even for people with sickness and not just accidents. Got to hear so many stories about families in deepest despair.
On woman that worked as a foster mum,,her hubbie died and she had a car accident and ended up in a wheel chair and they had one kid of their own. She did not get ACC since they thought pay she got for being a foster mum was not a pay. So she did get no help at all. I met her, broken wheel chair that was put together with silver tape,,and she had a old horse cover around her cold lower body, begging for food at the church. (local radio had a program about her)
I met so many people that lived in misery- kiwis.
I did talk with politicians, doctors, palliative care, cancer foundation other patients. Hubbies sisters said I was wrong and they did contact cancer foundation and found out what I had already found out.
All thought there was help to be found and they all were ashamed when they told me what they did find out.

When kiwis get sick they are bad out.
I did contact hubbies kids and sibblings and asked them to come and sit with him so I could get one nights sleep. Medication that did not work since he did not answer to morphine.

His family said: get someone from the local health center or ask palliative care!
I did never during 1.5 years get one nights sleep or anyone to help me out!
I had palliative cares "psychology nurse" to just confirm that there is nothing nothing nothing!

Then there was a car accident with people from my home country involved.
A family fathre of three that died and his wife was in a bad shape. Three kids that were in a country where they had no one.
I called the consulate and asked if I could do something.
Was told the mother in the family had said no to help!
Was she in chock or? ofcourse but when she says no it is no.
I did call the hopsital where she was to check out and offer help with the kids.
Ther was this foreign doctor with a silly accent that answered the phone. Heey I recognize that accent! Yap, he was one of mine!
He said the family got all help from him and another doctor that also was from my home country. Both working on contract at the hospital!
I went to see one of them when I drove hubbie to hospital.
They asked why I was at the hospital and when I told of cancer and chemo and big surgery and that he did not respond to amfetamine or morphine they asked about what the results were at the pain clinic!
I said the palliative team had said there is no pain clinic.
They rushed him to the pain clinic..but it was too late done and he did not respond,,should had done it months earlier.
Hubbies surgeon and the palliative team was notified that we had been at the pain clinic without referred by them.
I was told to mind my own business and dont interfer!!
I told I am my hubbies ombudsman and if they dont do then I act!
A simple thing as being forced to park in hospitals parking garage and pay expensive fee everytime...
I met a coupld in the elevator that told the ward could pay it for me when being there often.
I had not been given this info and the ward told me that they do not inform about this since they have to pay the fee and they dont want to! they saw me get there every day week after week and did not tell!
The volonteer drivers to the hopsital want 10-20 dollars a trip and they are often old people that want to tell how their partnetr died in cancer! 50 km and listen to this when you have sever pain and are dying! no nono!
During this time I did find a mailing list for people with same type of cancer. Americans and aussies. They all got better care and more x-rays done.
Also they were all prescribed vitamin B jabs since no stomach no vitamin B intake at all. I had to argue argue and argue this until hubbie got b jabs!
Also, americans have a bad position when it comes to health and care when getting sick and have no insurences. I did find out that when they were dying and there was no return they did get their invalid pension paid out.
Not even when hubbied did weigh under 50 kilo and doctors siad he had no more than months he did not get a OK to get a invalids pension!
Hubbie was very sad when he stated that he had pai tax his entire life and woyld not get one single dollar when he only had short time to live.
Espescially when even the yanks got this.
I did discuss with WINZ and they said: arent you lucky that you are in NZ where we look after each other when things like this happen!
That if I would resign from work and get like 100 dollars a week to cover everything.I then told. In europe you get 90% of your pay for hubbie,,and 90% pay for me looking after him when we get doctors word on that he is bad out and even extra money if w were on low pay! Extra money to cover rent, food, medication, travel ,hospital and so on. WINZ lady asked me if I was sure,,ooh yes,,even in italy it works like this.

So,,local politicain ,doctors, palliative care, winz, rotary, his work and his ex collegaues,,his sibblings, his grown up kids,,,,,
they all said there is help to get..but not from us, look elsewhere!..those that tried to find were ashamed over what they did find.

Thinking about that private organisation of people that were in same position as me,,can't just remember the name of the organisation.
Me not being native english,,never exeperinced any hardship because of that ,,I am kind of talkative and no one never did misunderstand me,,
A lot of people in NZ think that ACC covers when it goes like this,,it doesn'!
Hubbie used to tell me that I would never sound like a kiwi and that I did write wors in wrong order but that I did do good :)
Al authority people that did try to find out how to get help, they all did just rund straight in to the wall.
They all thought ther was help and that NZ had it set up pretty nice and the mocking in mentality.
Mocking in did not exist without a camera as hubbies used to say, humour all the way :)

When hubbied died his grown up kids came.
He doesnt need his fishing gear any more,,no need for his chain saw,,no need for his rifles,,no need for this and that .
I was in chock. They carried out stuff for three days.
They went in to town to have meals and did not bring me!
After three days I did scream out loud.
They left the building and never ever checked if I was OK.
OOh I forgot, they did contact my solicitor to check if any money and what to be able to claim!
(grown up kids with good works and paid homes and new cars)
I sat alone for 1.5 years with hubie sick.
After he died I sat 1.5 years alone until house sold and paper work OK so I could pay a ticket out of NZ.
3 years and his kids and sibblings did do nothing for either him or me.
Hubbie once said: they might not want to see me sick but they wil come when I am gone to help you because you have been a good wife.
So glad he saw public trust and made his wil to be to me only,,otherwise I would have been home less and no money to get back home!

The "only" help Igot was from you guys!!
I got gas cheques in the mail!!!
Get this LSB was the only help!

Not even rotary came and helped out with fire wood when they were asked several times and told of how bad it was.
Not even hubbies work mates came once during his sickness to visit him!
(they had fire wood at his work..........)

You guys at LSB where the only ones!! LOVE YOU!

OK was to be a short notice. bla bla bla :)

Do you want the rest of the story?? :)

Typing on a really bad lap top,,not revesring to see if spell error,,sorry :)

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8 years 5 months ago #479139 by Muz1
Replied by Muz1 on topic Any recent updates on Hestia?
Hi Hestia. I'm new to your plight but your description sure allows a quick understanding of the troubles you endured. I can vouch from personal experience, although not as bad as your case, that authorities do not talk to each other and that because of budget awareness, welfare bodies do not advise what you can claim for. Your late husbands family might one day feel guilty about their actions-they will face the wall sometime and realise they could have been more helpful towards the care of their father.
Time will dim your memories and remove some of the pain experienced and I hope you find plenty of good times in future-you sure deserve it.

Everything Must be Somewhere

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8 years 5 months ago #479142 by kate
Replied by kate on topic Any recent updates on Hestia?
Hi Hestia, great to hear from you :D

I remember your stuggles so well and have often wondered what happened to you. For the last 18 months my mother has been terminally ill and is getting help from Hospice at Home. They visit her every day to restock her morphine pump and she goes in once a week to meet with others. My experience of the treatment of people with terminal cancer has thankfully been a lot better than yours. I can't imagine how difficult it was with no support.

I'm glad we could help you even if only in a small way.

Last I heard you had left NZ, so how is your life now? I hope things are a lot better and you are happy.

Cheers
Kate

Web Goddess

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8 years 5 months ago #479151 by Hestia
The thing is that all those bred and born kiwis that thought there was help to get did try to find out and all got the same answer. The was no nurse to come home and help out with anything whatsoever and no money and no fire wood.
All those kiwis in hardship that I got to know of.
I did myself work on a authority and they followed me to WINZ and could not even make rotary come with fire wood . I had paper work from Palliative care and local doctor telling he was to die within months and still they told me that I owuld have to resign from work and then they would look into what and if and how much,,but they clearly stated that I would not at all even get the low mortgage paid not even without the interest. Just and only to get a toilette seat and a seat over the tub so he could sit and shower was investigated by three different associations that came home to us and it toook 6 months to get the high invalid toilette seat and the bath tub seat. This was just 1-2 months before he died. But when they got to know that he was dead they came and picked it up within 24 hrs!
Bath tub, inside wasnt plan in the bottom so I couldnt just put a chair in the tub. I had to undress both him and me and hold him and walk him over the tub edge and then shower with him.

The organisation that was trying to spread the word about that ACC only covered accidents but should cover for illnesses and espescially those that could not be cured. How on earth can I have forgotten the name of them?
It was a "bunch" of people stuck in mud, just like me, I would/should support them today but have forgotten their name and old lap top is gone.

Anyhow,,house sold and same day it was sold I had a ticket bought on credit and flew out.
I had arranged for all animals,,freezer , new owner or follow me.
Before that I had had people trying to get what they could out of me.
Such nasty things so I wont go there.

Dogs costed me in about 12.000 dollars with jabs and vet and paperwork and transport.
I tried to rent a place in my home country but no one did want me since I have no income. No employer no rent, not even with a rent paid in advantage.
I could just not think ahead because of stress and totally worn out.
I had arranged with a car to be waiting for me at the airport, a old station wagon with service done and winter tyres on.
Thai air did let me carry many times more luggage than even if I had been first class! They knew and did get that I was to travel from summer to winter and didnt know where to go. I had big down quilts, long johns and stuff in two gigantic suit cases.
When I landed the airport did not know which terminal to pick up dogs in!
was it terminal one or two or even five?
It was 15 minus and deep snow and I could not walk with thos suitcaes and my car was to be delivered a couple of hrs later. Cab drivers didnt want to drive me to other terminals since that was just a few km away and they would lose their place in line outside the main terminal,, I cried,, sick of worries fo the dogs. I had to rent a limousine to get to the terminal!
The beauracracy took 2-3 hrs to relesae the dogs to me.
I then loadede then into my "new" car and drove off in right hand traffic and deep snow.
I had got a promise thru a LSB forum (!) to borrow a minimal bach a couple of hrs drive from the airport. 10 sqm with a bed and a electric heater.
I slept there for two days and then borrowed shower to get my self in order. I drove on to another place where I had been promised another larger bach,,20 sqm and cooking facilities but no shower and no loo and no water.
Just a temporary thing while getting money wired across and looking for a house. Since no emplyer I had to buy a house cash with what I had left,,not much.
This made me travel to places I had never been and far away from where I was born.
Found a house where a builder had left it not complete. He had extended the house to double size and did a runner with the owners money!
I bought this house and thought: whatever, when I get a work I brrow money and finsih this project off. (wasnt many houses for sale in the middle of the winter but had not other option since my kiwi house sold at that time after had been on market long time,, so when someone came with money it was: go go go)
So I sat in a house,,no furniture,,my container came.
But no work!
New rules and regulations makes emplyers to hire people under 25 with getting extra low taxes for them.
Laws made for emplyers are in rule so they dont want to be responsible for their emplyees so they rent people and those companies that rent out people do also not want to be responsible so they have found out that if you rent out peoples that are still studying or have other part time emplyment or retired,that will say have other source of income to 51% then they want you and rent you out. But they do NOT want full time unemployeed!
So for three years now I have sent in about 5.000 work applications and dont even get to an interview!
Every time I get an e-mail that says: thanks you but we had 400 applicants.
News papaers here have articles about poor immigrants with foreign names that cant get a work,,they describe mohammed that thinks we are racisistic towards him and thats why he dosnt have a work. I contacted severaljournalists and said: write about me,, I am local and cant even get to an interview,,this is how it is and has nothing to do with being foreign and out of other etnic group. The newspapers finds that not interesting and keeps on writing about poor immigrants.
I apply to all work openings I see.
Cleaning, nursing homes, super markets and so on.
Immigrants get extra help to get a work to make them atractive to hire,,emplyer pays less for them in taxes..so here I am!
I did for a start get those low bottom low work openings at nursing homes. Elderly double diagnos patients..wake up, dress, lift to wheel chair, feed and change on them.
But since so many unemplyees so now they require only nurses to do this!
I am no nurse.
So I tried to study,,bottom level nurse,,1.5 year..but I am too old to get any contributions towards my studies.
So here I sit.
10 more years to retirement and it wont be that much money since I have now not worked here since 2000 when I left for NZ.

We are getting more and more immigrants here,,specifically from syria and somalia. High income politicians try to shwo off and say we can afford them.
But those that come here will never get a work and they get benefits since they fall under that category.
We are not to talk about this and are then called racists which makes this even worse. We have EU people from Romania here begging in the streets and they get wellfare benefits since they have nothing and they come here over and over again. They sit outside every malland beg for money. Often young people that say they get no work in their own country but are allowed to be here since they belong to EU.
All these categories get social wellfare that is pretty good here! often better than a low income!
I get nothing since I have a house.
So here I sit.
On the private side...
My grown up kids were told a lot of stories by their dad when I left him. Both kids were adults in age when I left with kiwi hubbie.
Both kids dont even talk with me since I did run off with a foreigner.
They were fed with stories by their dad,,stories about how I had knewn Mike for years and cheated behind his back,,how that is possible since I did not even know Mike when I left their dad and Mike was down under!
Anyhow,,to build up a new life.
With my own laguage. :) No one asks me where I am from :)
I sit in my house with furniture that hubbie and I had and same porcelain ha ha ha.
Any how,,I had three dogs with me home.
Old bitch did have a romance with my then young male pup.
It was not to happen since bitch was 8 years old and never had had any litters before (rule within KC in europe)
Also the fact that my bitch had a good wllknown pedigree and so also the male dog.
But the male dog had not had his hips x-rayed and now she was expecting and it was not to be!
I did get money enought to x-ray the male to know what he carried.
He was not perfect and should not be bred from even though his lines were ok! :(

But now what to do?
She got 5 pups. One died at birth.
4 healthy pups :)
I felt like a grandma :)
I have never ever had pups before!
I tried to sell them as purebred but not KC registered since they were registered in USA and the KC here does not like that and process to get them recognized if ever.
I decided to keep one pup,,the one that was the one not to be sold.
Sold them for half price what KC registered costs.
One pup went to experienced dog hiome and with me owning the breeding rights, wanted to see that no one bred on bad lines,,wanted to see what happaned with pups, if carrying dads bad or the rest of the pads good lines.
Next pup, owners that were good but had no money, so they got the dog and I kept onwership.
Third pup, a bitch, sold to a ex breeder that wanted this beautiful pup that had lines from both USA and AUS. She said she wasnt to regsiter with the local KC.
The last pup,, a bitch she had struggled over the gate from the doog room to be with me already from age 8 weeks,,she climbd the gate every evening when I turned the light off and she crawld in to my bed :)
so I kept her.

Then it happened,,ex breeder mailed me and said she was to x-ray her bitch at age 1.5 years old and if she didnt pas thru she was to terminate her and say to all she had cancer!
She was perfectly happy with this girl and posted pics on FB until the vet said: no breeding from this dog. She terminated the dog and started to slander me as being a back yard breeder and people that never ever heard of me wrote nasty stuff on internet making it sound as if I had bred thousands of dogs that were sick and sold them thru ads on like trademe.
Me that is over 50 and this was my first and only litter ever!
Then dog number two,, a male,,did attack their other male dog and they did put him down.
Ex breeder took contact with pup buyer three and told that dogs bought from me are allsick and that I am a back yard breeder with bad reputation!

So today,,out of 5 born,,
one girl is alive and lives as a pet,(no contact with owners) pet just as I intended when I sold them!
One girl is snoring next to me on the couch :)

Three dogs with me home.
Old male is dead- age.
Old bitch, mother of the pups,,I did put her down a couple of months ago,,old age.
Young male dog is now 7 and his dughter is 2 years old.
Old male is a handfull since he came to me and hubbie when he was a pup and we did not know of hubbies cancer then.
This dog grew up with me and hubbie during his sickness and Ihad no time to find people to socialize him with so he is a one person dog. I was so scared when transporting him here,,I contactde several dog trainers,,one was famous in NZ and he said he was to come and help me because of circumstances, he never showed up. [:(!] :(
So I know this dog is always on lead when around people. He is good as gold with free ranging chooks and bunnies and sheep and steers and horses,,but no other dogs or people,,except gfor his daughter that he has known since she was a pup.

Me babbling :)

OK,,let you breathe and I take a short walk with the dogs an come back with the rest :)

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8 years 5 months ago #479152 by Hestia

Muz1;482637 wrote: Hi Hestia. I'm new to your plight but your description sure allows a quick understanding of the troubles you endured. I can vouch from personal experience, although not as bad as your case, that authorities do not talk to each other and that because of budget awareness, welfare bodies do not advise what you can claim for. Your late husbands family might one day feel guilty about their actions-they will face the wall sometime and realise they could have been more helpful towards the care of their father.
Time will dim your memories and remove some of the pain experienced and I hope you find plenty of good times in future-you sure deserve it.

Authorities not talking to each other....
Worst was the palliative team and the surgeon and the cancer ward that said: no pain clinic exists...even though he was one of 2-3% that doesn't respond to morphine or amfetamine.
They only gave hoim one cat scan/x-ray before surgery and said no more x-rays even though he was in sever pain.
They said he was probably imagine his pain!!!!
I did then find out firstly that there was a pain clinic in the same hospital and they had no waiting list!
They had ignored to communicate between wards!
Also when I was on the amilinglist with people from mainly US/Aus they all got a second cat scan/x-ray after surgery even without insurence.
When I did argue with the hospital they did finally send him to a abandoned appointment to get a scan.
They told there was no cancer on the scvan and that he was just imagening pain,,that all was fine.
A couple of weeks later they called and said they had brought his x-ray to a medical congress and another doctor saw things they had not seen at all. There was heaps of more cancer not in his stomach that was gone but around his back bone and aorta holding a firm grip.

During this time we were told there was a waiting list of 600 to do a scans and he waas down at the bottom.
(same time we scan ewes to see if the are preggers or not,,not to be compared but it felt like that when he was first denied and then on waiting list and then misread)

One doctor said: forget about leaving NZ ever since you are so sick so you can never sit on a plane.
Hubbie cried so I thought he was to get a heart attache and this was in the elevator down to the parking house,,how rude to say such a thing to him.

I know this is fading away,,would fade faster if life went on and I would have a work and kind of move on.
Mean while I get it out of my system with writing all of it down. 4oo pages that never wil be published but I get it out of my system :)

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8 years 5 months ago #479344 by max2
Replied by max2 on topic Any recent updates on Hestia?
Hi Hestia, good to hear from you and to know you are checking in. Do you regret moving back to your home country? Are you happy there?

I just spent less than a week back in Aussie and felt like an outsider, yet its where I came from. Sometimes I think its best not to go back, never the same.

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