Chicken for dinner? A joke :)

Chicken Surprise

A couple go for a meal at a Chinese restaurant and order the
'Chicken Surprise', the waiter brings the meal, served in a lidded cast iron

pot.

Just as the wife is about to serve herself, the lid of the pot
rises slightly and she briefly sees two beady little eyes looking around
before the lid slams back down.

'Good grief, did you see that?' she asks her husband. He hasn't,

so she asks him to look in the pot. He reaches for it and again the lid
rises, and he sees two little eyes looking around before it slams down.

Rather perturbed, he calls the waiter over, explains what is
happening, and demands an explanation.

'Please sir,' says the waiter, 'what you order?'

The husband replies, 'Chicken Surprise.'

You're going to love this..................

You're going to hate yourself for loving this!.............

'Ah! So sorry,' says the waiter, 'I bring you Peeking Duck!'

laugh out loud good!

I've had a bottle of neat bourbon, and it's still not funny...

The bottle is a 50mls one, I'm not a sot lol

:D:D you got me good yes do feel like that LOL

Kiwi303;235446 wrote: I've had a bottle of neat bourbon, and it's still not funny...

The bottle is a 50mls one, I'm not a sot lol

Dont believe yer!

wot? that it's not funny or that I'm not a sot?

Bought some 50 ml pottles to make pate with so much more convenient to empty two pottles into the pan than to open a litre and then have the bottle calling to to you each time you go past it the next few days

$3.50 per 50mls fromt he shop, but hotel room minibars charge upwards of $9 each! wot a markup! (or is that rip off?)

Now I know your fibbing about being a sot!

...."empty two 'p'ottles into the pot" !!!!

:D:D:D:D

Send these as well

One morning in Dublin a man comes into church on crutches. He stops in front of the holy water and splashes some of it on both of his legs, then throws away his crutches.

An altar boy witnessed the episode and runs into the rectory to tell the priest what he'd just seen. Without batting an eye, the priest says, 'dat's de power o' faith my son, you've just witnessed a miracle.

Be telling me then, where is this blessed man?

'Sure an he's flat on his arse Father, over dere by the holy water.'

Parvinder and Habib are beggars. They beg in different areas of London. Habib begs just as long as Parvinder but only collects £2 to £3 every day. Parvinder brings home a suitcase FULL of £10 notes, drives a Mercedes, lives in a mortgage-free house and has a lot of money to spend.

Habib says to Parvinder 'I work just as long and hard as you do but how do you bring home a suitcase full of £10 notes every day?' Parvinder says, 'Look at your sign, what does it say'?

Habib's sign reads 'I have no work, a wife and 6 kids to support'. Parvinder says 'No wonder you only get £2- £3.

Habib says... 'So what does your sign say'? Parvinder shows Habib his sign.

It reads, 'I only need another £10 to move me and my family back to Pakistan'