I am leaving

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15 years 9 months ago #11246 by PeterNZ
I am leaving was created by PeterNZ
After long consideration I decided that I will not participate here any longer for the time being.

What happened?

I assume a lot of you followed the Arapawa topic and the discussion on there. Yesterday I wrote a post on there and the usual people jumped on me. So I defended myself. But all was still related to the topic if you ask me. And I didn't really address her directly. It was her choice to pick on me. No strong langauge was used, no one was called an i d i o t (wasn't I called an i d i o t recently?) or similar but it got a bit heated. For my opinion, no reason for anyone to get too upset. I usually do not use personal attacks etc. I might have a different opinion than some people here and I defend my opinion, but that's it!

Well, some nice people on this board got upset about something. I am not sure about what but I suspect about me having a different opinion and expressing this! Since there was no abusive language uesd that's the only explanation I have. So they blackmailed the owner of the forum and threatened to leave. Kate then sent me an email telling me that I have to stop having this discussion with this person since she doesn't want to have this forum used for a "personality clash". I just hope that the other person involved got a similar email, but honestly, I doubt it! But I felt like a 15 year old who just got told off. Sorry Kate, but I don't think that this should be handled in such a way. But I don't blame you! Again, that's just my opinion!

I obvioulsy do not fit into "Your place" which I assumed is "you and my place" but found out it is only "Your place". I can only be myself and that's who I am. I am not willing to be not myself. See, I never learnt the concept of politcal correctness and after living in this PC country for over 8 years now I meanwhile learend that PC creates a lot of interesting things. One of it is obviously sending emails in the background instead of facing your opponents and telling them what you think. I find that very sad. Words like "cowards" come to mind! Do I want to be part of such a group?

I am hurt. I must admit! And not only from this latest situation. I got hurt when people called me an i d i o t, told me "We here in NZ do it this way" and other things.. Well nobody send an email then! So what does this tell me? Maybe that I don't belong to thi scommunity.

The question I asked my self is "Why would I voluntarily go to a place where I am obviously not wanted?" What did I want to achieve? I wanted to move something! I wanted to get people thinking. I failed!

I have the feeling that people want to protect the picture of a perfect world here in "Your place". But it is not a perfect world. You can't please everybody. But the sad thing is that what I've seen from emails sent to me, a lot of people already gave up and restrict themself to - well - to just the PC stuff. What I find very sad. And this is something Kate probably doesn't know. She only sees the people who send those blackmail emails. Because the other people just gave up!

Over the time I was a member here I met a lot of very nice people. The LSB forum was basically with us from day one. I got my two milking goats from there and just recently our wonderfull Border Collie Molly! These are the great moments I had on this site! I got heaps of good advice and I hope I could help one or the other people.

Well the not so great moments - I try to forget. I just want to say that I hope Toni that you enjoy your victory! Your support group has done well. "One down - how many to go?" And yes, that's how we immigrants do this here in New Zealand, we say openly what we think and are willing to listen to other people's opinion.

I can also see where the majority of the people is positioned if it comes to conservation, environmental issues and organics. I seemed to have forgotten that this is after all a farming forum and that even the smaller farmers sometimes mirror the big guys. This is reflected in the DOC bashing ("DOC Nazis go over the top again" later changed to "DOC tyrants...") and in the lack of interest in any other topic in this area. This is not how I choose to live and I do not want to be part of such a community! I wasn't sure if I overreacted when I decided to stay away from this, but topics like "DOC Nazis" made the decision easier.

So with a very heavy heart I say goodbye to this here. I know a lot of people love to se eme go! That's ok! I wish you all the best and good luck with the Arapawa action - if there will be any action. Maybe I'll see one or the other friendly person somewhere. I would love to! It will be impossible to find a replacement for this forum since it is the best in New Zealand! But that's how things go sometimes.

Cheers

Peter


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15 years 9 months ago #174578 by Kiwi303
Replied by Kiwi303 on topic I am leaving
I never paid any attention to the awapara thread past page 2...

we'll miss ya. do come back some time.

You Live and Learn, or you don't Live Long -anon

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15 years 9 months ago #174580 by reggit
Replied by reggit on topic I am leaving
PeterNZ, I'll miss you :(

You are right, this is the best LSB forum, but on here, as in life, sometimes you need to pick your battles and walk away from others [;)]

If you do take time out, I do hope you'll come back before too long [:I].

Take a break...while I take care of your home, your block, your pets, your stock! [;)] PM me...

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15 years 9 months ago #174584 by Birman Babe
Replied by Birman Babe on topic I am leaving
Same, I didnt even enter that thread myself.
Will be sorry to see you go but if I were you I would just opt out of threads which get heated; well I do anyway. Think in all the years I have been a member I have only lost my rag once :-)

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15 years 9 months ago #174585 by Kiwismum
Replied by Kiwismum on topic I am leaving
Well Peter, I hope you come back long enough to read this at least.

I never read any of the awapara thread so don't have a clue what went on there or who was involved. But I can say that in the years that I have been reading here, you are one of the ones who I have noticed what you say, and so it is with a sad heart that we have to say good bye to you.

I for one would welcome a change of heart on your part, but that is for you to decide. I will miss your wisdom, and hope that you can bring yourself to visit my blog and make a comment any time you feel like it. Another opinion is always welcome even if it becomes different to my own sometimes, we all have something to learn from one another.

Good Bye friend. :(

A candle loses nothing by lighting another candle.
A person only gains light
by bringing light into another's life
www.dreamforthree.co.nz/

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15 years 9 months ago #174590 by simon@sue
Replied by simon@sue on topic I am leaving
In my brief time here i have enjoyed reading your posts and it was nice to find another lover of decent beer :) - hope we see you back

4 acres with Garage/sleepout, a pond with ducks and frogs, lots of trees ready to burst into life in spring and lots of garden beds.

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15 years 9 months ago #174593 by hilldweller
Replied by hilldweller on topic I am leaving
Another one here who missed the Arapawa 'debate'. Hope you come back Peter - it's always good to hear different voices. All the best :)

hilldweller

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15 years 9 months ago #174595 by poaka
Replied by poaka on topic I am leaving
I never followed it either til now...sorry you "culled" yourself "

Statistically, 6 out of 7 dwarves are not Happy. [:)]

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15 years 9 months ago #174597 by jen
Replied by jen on topic I am leaving
I think that sucks Peter.

People are entitled to opinions and they must all be respected. Its a very sad indictment indeed when people feel the need to make those differences personal rather than saying "I disagree .. and here's why". There's no need for name calling or even for referring back to people who you know will disagree. There is political correctness and then there is tolerence, respect, common courtesy and diplomacy. I think these often get confused and lumped together. I think most people would not dream of debating with someone face to face and calling them and idiot or bashing their opinion directly to their faces. I think that's a thing that's too easy to do when you're in the privacy of your own 'browser' typing away as a knee jerk reaction. Hopefully people will come to realise this.

I think if the references to individuals in certain posts are personal they should be edited by the mods and come with warnings for those involved, but I think it needs to be fair on all sides. If you read around.. there are several people who are real quick to be intolerant of others.. personally I find this is a weakness in character and being rude or 'personal' in any retort should not be tolerated in ANY posts. I think there has been alot of tolerance of the 'intolerant' few on this website. It doesn't go unnoticed.

Those who repeatedly engage in this behaviour should have temporary bans put on them as they do in other forums.. call it 'quiet time' since it's really just an exhibition of childlike behaviour and it does not contribute anything useful to any discussion! (This should apply no matter how long they have been members or how much other knowledge they may posess)

IT ALWAYS ends in people getting upset or angry.

And this is nothing to do with PC it has to do with not behaving like spoiled over-indulged children who are allowed to continually misbehave who excuse themselves by pleading "I'm allow to bloody well do/say what I want" as they stamp their feet.. well.. sorry. Not in a public forum. It shouldn't work that way anywhere. This is a place for people to learn.. not to get sh!t on for having a say.. and not to have people abuse others for their opinions.

I posted early on in the Arapawa thread trying to get people to remain constructive, because a very important topic was deteriorating to name calling etc. Kiwiw303 admits to tuning out then.. well I hope those people are pleased with themselves. they have surely managed to alientate some who may have benefited from reading the debate from different perspectives.

If any of you think that behaving like a bullies in your posts is acceptable no matter who you p!ss off... I would urge you to think again about why you're here at all...
If you can't accept others opinions why are you reading at all? Go read a story book instead and let others get on with being constructive and making progress in their own ways. There are rules of conduct everywhere...conform or dont' take part at all.

And really there needs to be some consistency no matter what's done. Edit out all personal comments.. and people who continue to be the culprits have no need to be here ruining it for everyone else.

And Peter.. no I don't think you should be going.. the debate is only ever useful if all sides are covered.. you're the perfect candidate for that. We'd all be fools to accept only what we know as 'right' without getting the other end of the stick!

jen (returned to townie life)
community.webshots.com/user/j_nepton

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15 years 9 months ago #174599 by PRU2
Replied by PRU2 on topic I am leaving
Wow, Just had to go and see what this was all about, I too only got to the first 2 pages and got a little bored some time ago.
After reading on just now, Seems to me someone should be directing all their energy directly to DOC [}:)], Peternz.(Not U)
I hope you lurk Peter, I tend to disappear for a time after getting a verbal on here.
I work for a Govt Dept ( Not Doc) and we are bound by law not bring them into disrepute, no matter how much we may personally disagree with "some" actions of the Dept, our love of our jobs at being able to make NZ a safer enviroment is what counts..
I must revisit a thread that I have been "invovled" with this morning to see the backlash [:I][B)]

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15 years 9 months ago #174611 by Toni - Northland
Replied by Toni - Northland on topic I am leaving
Well, I'm also sorry you are leaving, again. Victory?????? I don't consider anyone leaving here a victory. Things got heated, surely they are now 'back on track'. I for one don't bear a grudge to anyone here.

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15 years 9 months ago #174613 by oskatd
Replied by oskatd on topic I am leaving
Peter, sorry you are leaving, I have never had a problem with the way you have expressed your difference of opinion, shame. I haven't read the thread involved, and won't bother now, but I can probably guess what (or who) the problem is - I've been there too, so I sympathise. Please don't feel bullied out - remember what goes around comes around in this world.....

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15 years 9 months ago #174614 by The Kats Place
Replied by The Kats Place on topic I am leaving
Oh Peter - thats sad - don't go :( :( :( :( :( :(

kats
Live your life in such a way that it will be easy for people to say nice things at your funeral [;)]

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15 years 9 months ago #174615 by oskatd
Replied by oskatd on topic I am leaving
Hehe, just read the rest of the thread, and Jen I love your idea about punishing repeat offenders - nice one! Perhaps we should have a poll......

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15 years 9 months ago #174618 by Toni - Northland
Replied by Toni - Northland on topic I am leaving

oskatd;145777 wrote: Hehe, just read the rest of the thread, and Jen I love your idea about punishing repeat offenders - nice one! Perhaps we should have a poll......


Ok oskatd, you start one and I'll vote.[^]

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